Blarg #2 200 Word Story

It's late fall and it's just starting to get a little brisk outside, so I slip on my only jacket which seems suited to the temperature and venture outside my house. I start walking down the path behind my house, it looks rather good with all the orange and gold leaves sprinkled about, one might even say it's beautiful. I continue down the path noting all the deciduous trees, who's needles stay right in place while those around them seem to fall apart with the wind. As it is a bit chilly I slip my hands up into their respective pockets and close my fingers around a handful of coins, I pull them out and upon inspection discover I have rediscovered eight dollars in toonies and loonies that I must have left there many months ago. I decide to change course from Research Park to Market Mall, or more importantly, the nearest Starbucks. I march my way through the leaves of the un-swept pathways, past another park, and then once clear of trees I crossed an overpass to the mall. Once inside I bee lined for the Starbucks nearest me, and after waiting in line for a short while I ordered myself a tall mocha cookie crumble frappuccino and too my delight, discovered that you could also get a full cup of whipped cream, entirely for free! This was an offer I couldn't resist so I also ordered a tall cup of their delicious chocolate whipped cream, and then took a bench seat to wait for my order. There were two men beside me who looked to be in their early forties discussing evolution, the extinction of the dinosaurs (more specifically how it was in fact the dust shot into the atmosphere from the impact of a large meteorite which blocked out the sun and which led to their demise), and the effects of overspecialisation of certain species and how that has effected their longevity. Unfortunately all too soon my order was called and I stepped up, took my two (if it can be called two) drinks, and almost entirely uneventfully made the trip home, with the frost of the evening only finding its way to my ears.

Based on a true story, very uneventful, but almost true.

1st L.A. Assignment 250 Words About Yourself

Salutations,

I'm Noah and amongst other things I am not exactly sure what to write in this two hundred and fifty word paragraph style blog type thing. Any ways, twenty eight words down, only two hundred and twenty or so left to go. As I've heard you seem to have noticed that I enjoy laughing at the language arts teacher and during her class, not only is this extremely personal but you are the only teacher whom I have ever laughed at during their class. Regardless I'm supposed to tell you about myself, well for starters I love music, for the most part I only listen to underground rap but I do enjoy classic Wu-Tang Clan and also some more alternative stuff.

Almost without question my grandest obsession is cars, but lets be clear, not all cars receive my affections. My most hated group of cars are bar none muscle cars. I hate all modern muscle cars, and I hate ninety nine point nine nine percent of classic muscle cars, the Shelby AC Cobra being the only exception to this rule. Why do I hate muscle cars? Well probably what most offends me about muscle cars is their design philosophy, "more power, less money". Actually that's an lie, what I most hate is people who love the performance of muscle cars while either considering them true sports cars or comparing them to real sports cars and claiming that they are better because they have better straight line performance. That brings me to what I hate the second most about muscle cars, how now a days they pretend to be sports cars. No. That to me is unacceptable. Why is it unacceptable? Because nine out of ten times they are a poorly engineered, unreliable, chunk of American pig iron which empowers their drivers to think that they are the coolest people on the planet when in fact they are complete losers with no taste, or understanding of real motoring. I can admit, sometimes I enjoy the idea of a certain muscle car, or I like the looks, but having been in my fair share of them they simply feel like they are not very well put together and the ergonomics are almost always atrocious. I should be clear, I am only speaking of most American built muscle cars, AMG vehicles and the likes from Stuttgart actually warm my heart! And now that I'm done explaining why American pig iron puts me off I can tell of what cars I do like! From more mainstream stuff Porsche is my favourite, but not by much. I love their driveability, reliability, styling, practicality and their engineering is simply marvellous, it extends from the exterior design to the interior and makes for a sense of occasion but usability and luxury that is simply at the top of it's class. Secondly I love AMG vehicles, Mercedes AMG for those who are not in the know, are absurdly powerful, tire shredding machines of absolute inanity and joy. Their still fairly practical and the luxury is immense as well. AMG engines sound like hammers, their exhaust note is described by many as the fifty calibre AMG soundtrack, and I must say that is spot on. Why they are so special, at least to me is their pure absurdity, how ridiculous and flamboyant they are and yet when only glanced at the casual observer will only see a normal Mercedes. If you seem to think that my hatred for pig iron and love for AMG seem contradictory, I doubt there is any hope for you and will spare my words.

Now that I've realized this rant has gone on for far too long I will close saying I love small supercar and small hypercar marques. Nothing can really shine a light to what it would be like to own a Koeinsegg, or a Pagani. Look those up and even if you aren't an enthusiast you will still be able to appreciate their beauty. Now as you've probably learned, I'm Noah, and I could talk to you about this for hours. But no one really cares and now that my two hundred and fifty word quota is fulfilled I'm going back to sleep.